Meeting people online, no matter whether it’s through dating websites, sex hookup sites or social networking sites can require a person to be smart and creative about figuring out who is being honest and who is not. It’s unfortunate, but not everyone on the internet is telling the truth about who they are or what they’re looking for.
There are men pretending to be women because women often have a much easier time getting people to instant message with them. There are people who are already involved in a relationship and are only looking for people for cybersex and online companionship, but they tell the single people online that they’re single and looking for a real life relationship.
It isn’t always easy to pick out the people who aren’t being honest when communicating by e-mail. Many times these people will be pretty smooth and have their spiel down to a science, so they can sound very convincing in the beginning. It becomes obvious that there is something not right when they are pressed to meet in person or sometimes even when pressed to talk on the telephone. If a person claims to live close by and keeps putting off meeting in person, there is probably something up. With all the free long distance plans that most people have on their mobile phones, if the person lives in the same country and they won’t talk on the phone, they may not be on the up-and-up.
A great way to weed out the people who may not be looking for the same thing is to ask them to chat on webcam. Another tip to avoid getting emotionally involved with a fake person is to push to make plans to meet relatively quickly. If they can’t talk on the phone, webcam or meet in person within a reasonable amount of time, it may be best to move on to someone else who can. No sense getting attached to a fake.
Critics seem to be the people most perturbed by the obvious, as if they are just aching to pounce and will at not only the slightest provocation but at redundancies. If an online dating site has the word sex in its title, advertises for causal hook-ups, then a person could be against that way of dating, but don’t be surprised when you find a certain morally casual attitude of the people who populate that site! If one is on a single’s dating site for Christians, most likely, one is going to find Christians there and someone devoted to being a Muslim will probably not find as many takers.
Just what is it the criticism is about…online dating sites being too obvious?
The beauty of the web for dating is that no one has to truly hide what they do, how the act and what they look for on it since we can all pretty much remain anonymous when logged-on. But critics of this new way of interacting are ever mindful of just what sites advertise-and usually spit their venom at sites that advertise sex-and become crazed when they log-on to a site just for research purposes, mind you, and get exactly what the site reports to give.
We might want to live in a world to our own design but that’s just not the way it’s going to play out for any of us. We will come-up against different world-views, kinks and fetishes we can’t stomach in our bed, single people who date their own gender and the opposite in equal measure. It might make us sick, it might rock the very foundation of our beliefs, , but if the way people are interacting is advertised on a site, or we have a hint that things may occur online in a way we could be repulsed, like listening to a radio station we don’t like or seeing a T.V. show we have seen too many times before, we can chose to click out mouse on some other site, or never peruse the portal that offends us.
Online dating can seem very competitive sometimes because there are so many people who are using online personals to find a good match for a relationship. Women usually get bombarded with messages, mostly from men who haven’t even bothered to read their profile. A lot of women get a bit annoyed that most of the e-mails they get are from people who aren’t a good match or that they’re purely sexual in nature. Meanwhile, nice men who are sincerely looking for a relationship get very frustrated because they send out so many e-mails and rarely ever get a response. It’s easy for women to miss out on an e-mail from a well-intended gentleman amidst all the other e-mails that they get every day. It can be difficult to separate the wheat from the chaff, but the end result is there are a bunch of people not getting dates or meeting good matches after spending hours each week on dating sites.
It really isn’t difficult for a guy to write an e-mail that stands out from the crowd. It is usually best not to send an e-mail that simply says hello or how are you. That comes across as lazy to many women, and they simply won’t respond. Most women prefer to receive an e-mail from a guy before he sends her a chat request on sites that have instant messaging. A simple note of introduction, asking if they would be interested in chatting goes a long way toward getting women to agree to chat.
Another important tip is to write e-mails in full sentences and words instead of using the shortcuts that we all use when we’re texting. Writing the letter u instead of writing out the word you may be fine for texting or IM’ing, but many women dislike seeing it anywhere else. Some online polls that show that women don’t even read e-mail messages and profiles containing those shortcuts. It sounds awfully simple, but these small suggestions can help guys get more replies.
With each culture comes their mores, customs and mysteries. To the west the east is full of enchantments and certainly influences all cultures off the American continent, certainly Asian countries. We are fascinated and a little unnerved by what we do not understand and titillated by opposite people and cultures because they are foreign to us.
This fascination is often revealed in how Asian women are dressed when they are sold to the western world in the porn or pop market. Fed a diet of stereotypes heterosexual western men expect Asian women to appear before him as either wan subservient geishas, all white powdery face and body contained in a traditional confining bodice or devilish seductresses in a long tight skirt sporting a generous slit up the side. Blurring the lines between the Asian ethnicities no westerner even really knows, the dressing of Asian women, often by the women completely aware and in charge of the image they are foisting on the public, is as much about fueling a stereotype as it is about making an Asian woman look alluring.
But what really is so alluring? Is it when we see our fantasy in the flesh or when we are surprised? When we see a copious amount of bare female flesh exposed or when we are denied seeing it by a custom we are intrigued by but do not understand? Does the specific mode of dress we see Asian women in so often really spark our libido as much as it does our expectation? And are we more comfortable and therefore readily more aroused have our expectations tickled then our lusts?
In the end we all realize, even if we ignore the fact, that what we want from our partners is their hearts and their heads, their feelings, hopes and dreams. We want to build an intimacy with someone-be they Asian, Caucasian or any other race-less by what they wear or why they wear but by who they are.